Where I discover that my talent for sarcasm is greater than my ''talent'' for plies~

Today is a day of randomness.
Random Def: at random, without definite aim, purpose, method, or adherence to a prior arrangement; in a haphazard way.
So just at the moment, I was thinking of my mom.
A happy mom means happy family. tired mom means uh oh you better run.
Yeah. I figured that all out on my own. With the help of my mother.
So thinking of my mother, made me think of coffee. Funny how that happens huh..
Anyway, so I was pondering, who was the 1st person to look at a bean and say, 'Maybe if I pound this with a rock, & put it in hot water, it will wake me up.' ?
I really have no idea, and as it turns out, no desire to look it up to figure it out.
You know, I never used to like coffee much...
Well, not at all.
(Besides being addicted to it when I was but a wee bald one.)
But, people change, and as they do, some of them start to like coffee.
Now don't even start about me turning out like my mother.
I'm not even close to leaving my coffee in the microwave after the 5th time of warming it up.
I like it too much for that.
No but really, its my mom, not me that I can imagine in the emergency room saying, ''Just put coffee in an iv an hook me up.''
Then she'd be oddly frowned upon, and I'd probably be asked to come into the next room and be interrogated by the doctor.
I can just hear it.
Doctor: ''Do any members of your family suffer from insanity?''
I'd reply, ''no, we all seem to enjoy it.''
That would go over well.

Well, enough with the coffee.
except for this ps.
I don't drink it more than once a day, usually not even more than once a week. And plusly,
I NEVER. EVER. drink it black. Not because I'm racist, my friends, but because that. is disgusting.

So who like's automatic doors?
IIII DOOOOO!!!!
I feel like a Jedi every time the automatic doors open.
I don't even know what a Jedi is.
It just sounds cool.

So. What's your most embarrassing moment?
Riiight. Like your actually going to post it on here.. that would be embarrassing. ...and extremely funny. So I'm thinking that you should. I just want to you all know, that I rarely am embarrassed.
Especially if I'm caffeinated. One time, my cousin and I decided to try out for a school talent show and dance our impression of ballet. It was pretty funny.
Practically all the judges took dance class.
We didn't get in.
Then I got asked the next morning if we were being serious...
I said, ''yes, weren't we incredible?, I did want to break dance on my head, but I decided that my talent for plies was greater. ''
I think I have a great talent for sarcasm. Maybe I should have done that instead.
But as amusing as that time was..
It was probably the time when I was most embarrassed..
If it weren't for the dance-class judges, everything would have been dandy.
So, until now I've put that little incident in the back of my head. In a box.
But sometimes its not enough to turn a page in life... you also have to rip that bad boy up and burn the pieces. Usually I don't do that. Because even the simplest things amuse me..
I really am hardly ever bored.
Sometimes I get a lot of raised eyebrows.
And so I march up to them and say "Are you insinuating that I should tolerate this diabolical insubordination from an individual whose mental capacity barely exceeds that of a Lima bean?"
That's when I discover they have a fateful eye-brow twitching disease.
Go figure.
That would definitely only happen to me.

That last part was made up.
In fact, practically all of this was.
except for the ballet part.
that was indeed true.
Life can be so cruel...
people who are cannibals, push doors that say pull.. judges who go to dance class, and blog posts that are all made up.
All along I was just practicing my lying skills for when I play the game of Mafia.
Its a confusing and mysterious world out there.

Anyway, I think this is about the end of my ranting randomness, I hope you all have a good day,
and that you aren't afraid to be a little weird.
I like weird people.
If I didn't I'd be a little bad off now wouldn't I?